Covert Abuse Tactics

Here is an example conversation with a covert abuser and the tactics they use to confuse you:

You were discussing your relationship , and he looks sincere and attentive while you talk (positive reinforcement)

For every issue you bring up he says he doesn't know what you're talking about (denial) or he retells his version of the story (gaslighting) and slips in a flaw about you (diverting).

You try to re-explain yourself so he can understand better. He explains why the problem is your perception (changing the narrative) and your difficulty and trusting others (distorting reality) he has a Perfectly response, and reason for why he does what he does (rationalizing) then he sincerely explains that he feels he's being controlled by you and has a hard time trusting you(playing the victim) that you don't care enough about his feelings (guilt tripping) and that he wants to take responsibility for his part (lies)

Then he takes the conversation off into another direction (diverting) and nothing gets resolved.

You feel blamed, but you think you must be too sensitive and reading into things. You are confused for feeling intimidated and defensive against what appears to be nothing. You wonder if you are the toxic person in the relationship

Have you recognized these tactics being usedin your relationship?