Let’s face it, some partners act more like children than they do willing and committed adults.
Mentally, emotionally, materially, we drag them along and try to bring them up to speed. But it doesn’t work that way. We end up disappointed and frustrated — for what? If you want to get your relationship back on track, both of you have to face the truth.
Living with a childish partner is no small thing. Minor disagreements become major issues, and immaturity turns into explosive bouts of conflict and misunderstanding. It’s hard to compromise with someone who is living in that childish place. It’s hard to build a clear vision of the future and strategy that helps you to achieve goals. This type of relationship comes with a lot of emotional imbalance and one-sided effort and decision making.
Little-to-no compromise. Compromise comes hard with the immature partner or relationship. When your partner is on the childish side, they can become demanding and bossy in all the worst ways. They may also struggle to see things from your point-of-view. These partners tend to want what they want in the moment, and that can come with a devil-may-care attitude that’s damaging to you emotionally.
Refusal to take accountability.
If you’re looking for a partner or spouse who’s going to be accountable, it’s not the childish person. There’s not enough awareness our courage there for them to be accountable for the things they get wrong. They will deny their mistakes both from a place of ego and from a lack of knowing. A lack of perspective means they don’t have the depth to understand how selfish and one-sided behavior can hurt other people close to them.
Lack of clear vision
What vision does your partner have for their life? This may seem like it doesn’t apply to you, but it does. We need to have a strong personal vision in order to build the right relationships that complement it. We must know who we are and what we want from our lives. The childish person struggles with that. Maybe they don’t know what they want, or maybe they have no goals. Either way, it can become a problem when times get tough in the relationship.
No real emotional control.
There’s no real emotional control or awareness when we’re talking childish partners and spouses.
They lash out and explode whenever they’re displeased. When we want to lean on them for emotional support, they’re often vacant, with no ability to truly empathize or connect.
Because they lack that awareness, they lack a certain point of view and understanding of their own behavioral patterns.
Inability to seriously commit. Commitment is always a struggle with a childish partner. You may find yourself a victim of regular cheating, or at the very least, someone who disappears and reappears when they feel like it. This failure to commit can leave you feeling insecure and questioning your abilities and your place in the partnership.
Failure to show up the right way.
When we invest in a serious relationship, we expect a certain level of support, affection, and compassion. The ball is always dropped in these areas when we’re dealing with a childish partner, though. They cannot show up for us, even in the most important moments; especially when it means the most to us.
They will, however, demand that we show up for them and will demand that they are celebrated when they show the bare-minimum effort.
Keeping it skin deep.
Superficial relationships are also pretty common when one partner is more immature than the other. Does your partner or loved one struggle to go skin deep? Childish partners are known for this. They keep it on the surface and don’t really like to get into deep topics or commitments that hold them down. Primarily, this happens because they lack in the emotional depth to go beyond the surface. Their lack of awareness gives them a lack of perspective on life and love.
Avoiding plans for the future.
An immature person is not someone who makes a lot of plans for the future. They tend to live in the moment. And while that can be exciting, it can also be problematic. When we’re serious about building lives together, we have to be able to strategize and make plans which allow us to conquer and accomplish our goals and dreams as a team. Are they always avoiding plans for the future? Take it as a red flag.
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