Love is wonderful. Most of us want a loving, lasting relationship. But, falling in love is a lot different from being and staying in love in a stable relationship. You think you want to be together forever when you're in love. But sometimes, the reasons you fall in love are just not enough to keep you in a steady relationship.
We often marry or settle down with someone we think we love enough to want to live with for the rest of our lives. But, sometimes, that’s not the case. Sometimes the physical side of love is so compelling that we don’t bother to understand all the other essential things necessary to keep a relationship going.
Sometimes, love feels so strong and right that there is nothing else to do but stay together and commit to each other regardless of our differences.
Sometimes, things work out, and we choose to stay together through thick and thin.
But, sometimes, the strains of life expose all of those issues we may never have considered and we find ourselves somewhere down the line unable to sustain a loving, committed relationship.
Often, life's unfolding events surprise us, and we may find ourselves on different sides of an issue.
Sometimes these differences prove to be too much for individuals and couples to handle. And when that happens, the relationship may end.
So after the dust has settled you may decide it’s time to find that special someone to share the rest of your life with. It is by no means easy to jump back into the ring when you’ve been hurt and maybe afraid to trust again. But you won’t know until you try.
Here are some ways to get a better relationship the second time-
Know yourself
Who are you now after all you’ve lived through, especially in a relationship? Are you a different person than when you first met and fell in love with your first partner? If you don’t know enough about yourself, it will be hard to know about another person.
Understand why your relationship failed
You must understand what went wrong, so you don’t mistake repeating the same patterns.
Find a better match
Now that you know what went wrong look for someone for all the right reasons. Yes, attraction is important, but you want someone on the same page regarding key issues.
Don’t fool yourself into thinking you’ll be able to work it out later if it’s not right from the beginning.
Leave your baggage at the door. Make sure not to carry old grievances with you. Whatever you went through in a difficult relationship is over. You’re starting fresh with someone who was not part of all the old drama. Don’t dump unhealthy patterns on your new partner. Let the new relationship strive for understanding, trust, and positivity.
Be open
From the beginning, let it all hang out. Say who you are and what you need. No deception,no secrets, no hiding. Allow yourself to be vulnerable. If you’ve chosen well, your partner will show understanding and kindness. Communicate consciously and constantly. Respect and civility are key. Listen attentively.
Appreciate everything
You have a second chance to love again.Your partner is sacred to you and your life. Appreciate all that they are and all that they do for you.
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